ם The Strangest Request His Dealer Ever Heard

Posted on April 3, 2007 at 6:41 pm

Keith Richards, apparently having run out of new things to snort, did a line of his cremated father’s ashes.

He once snorted the remains of his own dad, Bert, leavened with a bit of cocaine to make it go down easier. “He was cremated and I couldn’t resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn’t have cared … It went down pretty well, and I’m still alive,” says Keith.

What a character.

ם Best Local News Exposé Ever

Posted on March 23, 2007 at 10:15 pm

I love the media.

ם Gerald Ford Not Eaten By Wolves

Posted on December 27, 2006 at 1:53 pm

Gerald Ford was not mauled senselessly by a circus lion in a convenience store, as previously predicted in this SNL sketch starring Dana Carvey as Tom Brokaw prerecording news briefs for every possible death of the former President. (via Defamer)

Farewell to both of you, Gerald Ford and SNL being funny. Rest in peace.

ם In Memoriam

Posted on September 4, 2006 at 11:39 am

Two of the most depressing news stories of all time:

• Steve Irwin fatally speared through the heart by the barb of a stingray.
• Kids watch as clown is crushed to death.

The world is saddened, but also feels pretty guilty for wanting to laugh a little bit.